September 30, 2012

So Happy for You - So Sad for Me!

Good morning sweetie,
 
Grief is a funny thing – you never know when it will hit you again.  Some days I wake up and think I am fine, but other days it hits again and the loneliness is overwhelming.  Sometimes that loneliness occurs when I am with a group of people, or even with our family......that is why it is so strange.  Today is one of those days.
 
The days are beautiful right now. Crisp autumn mornings that turn into a beautiful warm day.  I have become a project person and I have done some things to our house to make it nicer and more comfortable.  I put a fireplace in the basement.  Sorry hon, because it cost some money, but I thought it would be better and I would enjoy it more than going on a trip right now.  A trip would just make me more lonely, where the house now makes me feel cozy and safe.  I have pictures of you hanging around – and they make me feel good, too.
 
Erin arranged for an interview with KELO that will air soon.  It is about the ALS walk coming up and why our family is so passionate about raising money for ALS. I am super proud of the kids for what they are doing and picking this way to deal with their grief.
 
I wish we could go riding in the Hills today.....
 
I may drive out to the Hills yet this fall.  It might make me feel closer to you.  I miss you so much sweetheart.  I am so happy for you, but still so sad for me.  I love you – always have, always will.

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